There’s no shortage of material. No shortage of men to destroy. I’m sure I could throw a rock in any direction, and hit a predatory one.
What I do know, is that if I intend to get away with my long-term plan of eradicating them, I have to be very calculating, very aware of my strengths, but most importantly, I have to know what my most debilitating weaknesses are.
My strength is that I have an intuition that is to be marveled at. My strength is that I think more deeply than than anyone, about anything. I see angles that people can’t even fathom. I see things that even evidence to the contrary can not shake me from. I have many more, I guess. But they’re yet to be seen. Yet to be utilized.
But my greatest weakness…
Is my anger.
It will either help me beyond anything I ever thought I could accomplish…
Or it will break me. It will end me. And if I let it kill me too soon, it would have all been for nothing.
Everything I wanted ot help with, would be lost. Because something tells me, that I am the one that has to do this. I am the one who has to start this. In this lifetime, leaving it to “hope” or anyone else…the change will never happen.
I’m not some martyr. A name to be pathetically droned to others so that they “never forget” what I did. I’m not a hero. I’m only someone so depleted from the madness of this world, that I had to act to show myself that even a single person, could make a difference in the course of humanity.
All anyone ever wants to do is rally people, create cults of hypocritical belief–talk. All they want to do is talk. They want to talk in big groups, get others to do the hard work, have others make sacrifices. In the end, only parroting to the world that someone else bought their “freedom” or “revolution” or “self realization” or other asinine idealogy. No one wants to take any accountability for anything.
The thing is, no one will probably ever know what I did. Mayve I’ll be some mythical entity for people to (again) rally behind only in “spirit,” for the accolade of social approval. But if I do this, if I do this intelligently, if I do this right, I will know and see the difference. And maybe the mystery of the origin of the events I set off, will encourage others to act on their own behalf. Not as a group, but as individuals, to take the very freedom they possess to create a better life–a better world–for themselves. A knowingness that while they lived here, they too created their own freedom from oppression, freedom from assault, freedom from the old thinking of this so-called “patriarchy.” This millenias old stupid, ignorant, evil propagation of a world ruled by the oppression of women, children, and even men—the non evil ones.
Maybe one day, they will all live in a world where the fear of of the base male animal will not rule. It would be a harmonious world devoid of their cruel jealousy and eternal tantrum of the woman’s ability to be the true creators of life.
